I wanted to spend a little more time on Self-Love, because it can be so easily misconstrued.
Self-Love actually comes from three different parts of our minds. It can come from Ego, it can come from Conscience, and it can come from Consciousness. Allow me to explain.
Self-Love that comes from Ego focuses on whatever benefits you. While a little ego is good and can serve to protect us, too much Self-Love from ego can be harmful. It often results in insult, neglect, or injury to others. Let me give you an example. You are up for a promotion. There is another person in your department who is also up for the same job. You begin spreading vicious rumors about this person in order to improve your odds of landing the job. That’s the form of Ego that can get you into trouble.
Let’s look at Ego in a person with Myasthenia Gravis. If you make things all about you and forget about the kindness and sacrifices people who love you and care about you are making in order to help you, you will cause strife, hurt feelings, and eventually push them away. In other words, Self-Love from Ego oftentimes results in negative outcomes.
Self-Love from Conscience can be a marvelous tool as it helps us discern right from wrong, but it can also be very harmful if our Conscience causes us to dwell on things from our past. For example, if we’ve done something wrong in our past and deeply regret it, sometimes our Conscience won’t allow us to let go. We are constantly tormented by our memories of how poorly we acted. God doesn’t hold grudges against us. If we’re truly sorry for something and ask God for forgiveness, regardless of how bad it was, God forgives us and moves on, asking only that we try not to repeat that behavior again. We need to follow this same philosophy. If we’re truly sorry for what we’ve done and have asked for forgiveness and attempted to make amends, then we need to forgive ourselves and let it go. Instead of a means of punishment or torment, we should use our Conscience to simply remind us not to repeat the behavior going forward.
Let’s look at Conscience in a person with Myasthenia Gravis. Most of us with Myasthenia Gravis have slowed down in terms of how active we once were. That gives us plenty of time for reflection. If in our reflection, we begin to dwell on a time when we didn’t treat a person properly, it will affect our attitude and well-being. If you continue to lament over something you’ve done in the past, that means you’ve never truly forgiven yourself. God doesn’t work that way and neither should you. If you’re truly sorry about something you’ve done, then ask God for forgiveness and, if possible, rectify that situation with the person who was impacted by asking for their forgiveness. Do we truly regret spreading rumors about someone in order to have improved our odds of landing that promotion? If so, ask God for forgiveness, ask that person for forgiveness (if possible) and forgive yourself. Once God has forgiven you and you’ve attempted to make amends, there’s no reason not to forgive yourself. Your slate is clean, so focus on keeping it that way.
Finally, Self-Love can also come from Consciousness. Consciousness is the most positive of the three. Instead of focusing on negativity like Ego or Conscience, Consciousness focuses on the positive and allows us to observe, appreciate and be grateful. It means being aware. When our minds are no longer busy plotting, like in Ego mode, or regretting, like in Conscience mode, we can begin to appreciate in Consciousness mode. I truly believe this is the mode that God wants us to live in. He wants us to enjoy life and appreciate everything around us, including ourselves. When we are in this mode, it’s so much easier to love ourselves and everyone around us. We no longer have to regret spreading rumors in order to secure that promotion because we’ve asked for forgiveness and made amends. Perhaps now is the time to start thinking about all the good qualities that person actually had. And, if they were the one that got the promotion, be happy for them because they probably deserved it.
Living in a Consciousness mode makes living with Myasthenia Gravis so much easier. We wake up thankful for the day, observing and admiring the things and people around us, and we become aware of how beautiful life can really be. I truly want you to think about that for a moment. Yes, you have Myasthenia Gravis. Yes, life is not easy. Yes, there are many things you can no longer do. However…..there are so many people and things around you to enjoy and appreciate that somehow the things you may be missing in life become less apparent as you begin to recognize how blessed you really are. You woke up this morning…blessing. You have people who love and care about you…blessing. You have a God that loves you and will protect you…blessing. In this mode, you can finally start loving yourself. You are kind. You are considerate. You love others. You are on this journey because God wants you to experience life, with all of its blessings, even when it includes challenges. It’s time to recognize the goodness inside you. It’s time to start sharing that goodness with others. You are so unique. You are such a blessing. You are you. When you take the time to realize all you’ve waded through, all you’ve accomplished, and all you have left to do, it’s easier to start loving yourself.
On this Thanksgiving Eve, I encourage you to celebrate your holiday in the Consciousness mode. Observe and admire. Start with yourself. When you can love yourself unselfishly, you become a blessing to others.
Happy Thanksgiving, friends!